The Happier Life Project

Modern Dating: Lessons on Love Bombing, Breadcrumbs, Ghosting & Moving On with Gabby (Part 1)

The complexities of modern dating can be challenging, and can significantly affect our mental and emotional health... Particularly if we have been on the receiving end of behaviour that is not kind.Terms like ‘love bombing’, ‘breadcrumbs', ‘ghosting' and ‘situationships’ have become so common, they are almost considered as acceptable codes of conduct. But the psychological effects can cause much stress, anxiety and a lack of self esteem. 
In the first of two episodes of The Happier Life Project podcast, host Gabby Sanderson delves deep into the research conducted by mental health professionals and relationship coaches on dating. Sharing solutions and tools to help us heal and move on, if we’ve been left disappointed by someone we have started to date.
After a few great dates we can see people through rose tinted glasses. And if we are keen to pursue a relationship we can let things slide such as; lack of communication, hot and cold behaviour, or someone not actively making an effort to see us and progress the connection. Often we think ‘what did I do wrong?’ ‘What's wrong with me?’ and blame ourselves, rather than questioning the inauthentic and emotionally cruel behaviour of the person responsible for causing us turmoil. 
Gabby explains why and how a love bomber disguises minimal intentions as maximum intentions. She also shares how to spot the red flags from time wasters, and why breadcrumbs are an emotionally manipulative tactic. Gabby reveals the reasons why ghosting says far more about the person and their shortcomings, who suddenly goes no contact, than it does about you. And offers suggestions on how we might learn from the experts and detach from trying to create a story from the story, move on,and redirect our energy into more positive areas of our life. 
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mypossibleselfTo follow Gabby on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/radiogabby
Resources:
The Personal Development School’s Thais Gibson: https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/Rapid Transformational Therapist Marisa Peer: https://marisapeer.com/Women’s Dating and Confidence Coach Amber Grubenmann: https://www.ambergrubenmann.com/Leading Dating Expert and Confidence Coach Matthew Hussey: https://matthewhussey.com/Self Help and Life Coach Margarita Nazarenko: https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/Dating Coach Evan Marc Katz: https://www.evanmarckatz.com/Relationship Coach and Attachment Style Expert Stephanie Rigg: https://www.stephanierigg.com/Psychological Well-Being Practitioner Marios Georgiou: https://theprivatetherapyclinic.co.uk/therapists/marios-georgiou/

Emotionally Equipped: Tools for Managing Strong Feelings with Dr Emma Hepburn

Emotions play a crucial role in our overall mental health, acting as both messengers and influencers of our psychological well-being. Positive emotions like joy, gratitude, and love can enhance mental resilience, foster strong social connections, and improve our ability to cope with stress. But on the flip side, the more challenging emotions such as sadness, anger, jealousy or anxiety, if persistent and unaddressed, can contribute to mental health issues and illness. Understanding and managing our emotions has a positive impact on our wellbeing. By recognizing and processing our emotions, we are better equipped to deal with life’s challenges, manage strong feelings, achieve better emotional balance, enhance our mental clarity, and improve our overall quality of life.
But how do we learn to manage our emotions more effectively? For many we can feel at the mercy of our feelings, unaware that by drawing from simple techniques from within, we can help mitigate their intensity and reduce overwhelm. 
This is where Dr Emma Hepburn comes in. An award winning clinical psychologist, lecturer, author and illustrator, Dr Emma has written and illustrated the books ‘A Toolkit For Happiness’, ‘A Toolkit For Modern Life’ and most recently ‘A Toolkit for Your Emotions - 45 Ways To Feel Better’. Dr Emma Hepburn is also one of the most well-known psychologists on Instagram as @thepsychologymum and has won numerous awards for her contribution to mental health awareness.
Dr Emma talks to The Happier Life Project host Gabby about how emotions are made and where they come from. She shares how emotional habits are created and what it means to be on the emotional roller coaster of life, with all of its loop the loops. Dr Emma also explains how our past history and experiences influence our brain and body to create an emotional response; and ways we can objectively step back to review if how we are feeling is more of an echo from the past, rather than an appropriate response to the present. Dr Emma reveals some of her favourite tools to manage more difficult emotions and suggests ways we might break emotional patterns that are not helpful to us. The expert psychologist also explains why we should never feel ashamed of our emotions and how we can positively influence others towards the feel good feelings too.
'A Toolkit for Your Emotions' helps readers to navigate and understand their emotions effectively. Taking a deep dive into how we feel, Dr Emma explains all the tools we need to intercept and redirect challenging emotions by offering practical strategies, exercises, and insights. Each topic is illustrated with Dr Emma's well-loved illustrations to make them accessible, meaningful and memorable. To purchase 'A Toolkit For Your Emotions' on amazon: https://amzn.eu/d/aXJOfnITo follow Dr Emma Heburn on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepsychologymum
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mypossibleself

Nurturing the Mind and Body Clock for Better Sleep with Dr Kat Lederle

If you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, you’re not alone. According to sleepfoundation.org adults need seven or more hours of sleep per night. However more than one-third of adults sleep less than seven hours per night on average, and up to two-thirds of adults occasionally experience insomnia symptoms.
We know that sleep is critical not just for our physical health, but our mental and emotional wellbeing too. If you're sleep deficient, you may have trouble making decisions, solving problems, controlling your emotions and behavior, or coping with stressful situations and change.
Dr Kat Lederle is a sleep and body clock scientist, author, and sleep coach, who is passionate about helping others sleep well and feel good. Dr Kat sees sleep as an act of self-care, and in her work with clients combines sleep science, with learnings from Mindfulness, Acceptance Commitment Therapy and Compassion Focused Therapy.
Dr Kat talks to host Gabby about how a busy mind is the cause of many sleep problems, and why there is a 40-70% higher prevalence of insomnia in women compared to men. Dr Kat addresses some of the sleep myths and explains why we need to let go of ‘sleep rules’, leading to sleeping well again. Plus, Dr Kat shares her thoughts on how we might overcome bedtime procrastination, and some of the reasons why she believes many do not prioritize sleep enough.
Dr Kat also explains how we can work with our body clock in a gentle and compassionate way, thereby setting ourselves up for a better night's sleep.
To find out more about Dr Kat and her sleep coaching methods: https://drkatsleep.com/Check out Dr Kat’s book ‘Sleep Sense’ which takes the reader through the science of sleep and why it is important for every single one of us, empowering you to take steps that are right for you to sleep well.
To follow Dr Kat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drkatsleep/To download the My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself

Movement: Moving More For Our Mental Health with The Mental Health PT

To mark this year's Mental Health Awareness Week theme, ‘Movement: Moving more for our mental health’, The Happier Life project went back into the archives to repurpose an interview host Gabby did with mental health and exercise coach Dan Hancock.Dan, who goes by ‘The Mental Health PT’ online, passionately believes in doing what works for you and you enjoy; is the key to a healthy, long lasting relationship with exercise. 
There are many reasons why physical activity is good for your body, but what often gets overlooked is the vast ways it can improve our mental and emotional health too. Participation in regular physical activity can increase our self-esteem, improve our mood and reduce stress and anxiety. It also can play a pivotal role in preventing the development of mental health problems, and in improving the quality of life of people experiencing mental health challenges.
So why do so many of us struggle to move more? In this episode of The Happier Life project, Dan and Gabby talk about getting over the hurdle of gym intimidation, why aggressive fitness plans, or ‘quick fixes’ are not the answer, what to do when we lack motivation, and working with what works for you.
Dan also talks about the numerous ways exercise plays a vital role in our mental health and how this inspired him to create the world’s first certification in Mental Health and Exercise Coaching.This episode will serve as a great motivator for both those who are wanting to move more and those already on their fitness journey. 
For more on Dan’s Mental Health Exercising Coaching program: https://mymhec.com/To follow Dan on Instagram:  @mentalhealthpt  To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcastTo follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleselfTo watch the video of this interview head to our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@mypossibleself1756
Note, The My Possible Self App is free to download and access all of its content. We have a variety exercise and movement videos created with your mental health in mind which you can find in the nutrition and exercise tab. Try yoga, pilates, strength, cardio... plus we even have a foundation for fitness program, for those at the start of your movement journey. 

Detached and Disconnected: Navigating Depersonalization & Derealization with Swamy G

Have you ever felt detached from your own life? Disconnected from yourself? Like you were an outsider looking in at your own existence? Going through the motions, emotionally numb, emotionally disconnected from people you care about? Or maybe you've looked at your environment and everything appears foggy? You feel unable to see your surroundings accurately, they lack vividness and coloring? Things don't seem real?Does this get in the way of your relationships and work? Or disrupt other daily activities?
Temporary feelings of depersonalization and derealization are common. About one half of people have felt detached from themselves (depersonalization) or from their surroundings (derealization) at one time or another. But if this is happening more frequently, or becomes a common occurrence; then you may be suffering from depersonalization-derealization disorder. 
Depersonalization-derealization disorder (DP/DR) is a mental health condition where you feel disconnected from your body, your feelings and your environment. It tends to come and go over a long period of time,  causing much distress and anxiety. 
Depersonalization-derealization disorder is thought to be caused by trauma or extreme stress. Adverse early childhood experiences, specifically emotional abuse and neglect, have been linked to the development of depersonalization symptoms. Feelings of depersonalization and derealization are common from significant stress or panic attacks. Individuals may remain in a depersonalized state for the duration of a typical panic attack. However, in some cases, the dissociated state may last for hours, days, weeks, or even months at a time. In rare cases, symptoms of a single episode can last for years.
Swamy G is a counselor who regularly writes about depersonalization (DP) and derealization (DR) at https://acoachcalledlife.com/ Having personally gone through the challenges of DP/DR and overcoming them, he created a comprehensive online program to help others fully recover from DP/DR. In this conversation, you’ll learn how the disorder is more common than you might think, and how and why many of us can struggle from depersonalization and derealization during our life. You’ll also learn all about the symptoms and stress factors, what to do if someone you care about might be suffering from, and how, with time and tools, we can recover. 
To work with Swamy G and/or learn more about depersonalization (DP) and derealization (DR): acoachcalledlife.com
To access Swamy’s comprehensive online DP/DR program: DPDR No More
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself

10 Effective Ways to find Calm with Rebekah Ballagh

When it comes to improving our mental well-being, practising calm is one of the best places to start. Clarity of mind is extremely important when you are dealing with stress, problems and emotional turmoil. And remaining calm in times of turbulence and chaos, allows us to think more logically and make decisions accordingly.
Rebekah Ballagh is the bestselling author and illustrator of 'Note to Self', 'Note to Self Journal', 'Words of Comfort', 'Be Your Best Self', 'Big Feelings' and 'Let's Go, Flo!' She's a qualified counsellor, somatic and nervous system regulation coach, trainer, speaker and the creator of popular Instagram community @journey_to_wellness_ Rebekah’s latest book '101 Ways to Find Calm - How to use your body to soothe your mind', offers simple, powerful tools to teach you how to safely feel and process your emotions, rewire your brain and nervous system, and how to deeply connect with yourself.
In this episode of The Happier Life Project Becks shares some of her favourite calming exercises from the book, whilst discussing with host Gabby why so many people around the world struggle with finding calm. Rebekah also talks about why it’s so important to complete the stress response and sit with and digest difficult emotions, in order to come to a more peaceful place in the body.
Gabby and Becks also look at the most common reasons why the brain won’t allow us to relax, and what we can do to override or disengage the body’s stress response - when it is unnecessarily activated.
To learn more about Rebekah’s courses, book and membership program: www.journeytowellness.online
To be part of Rebekah’s Instagram community: @journey_to_wellness_
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself

Hormone Hacks and Working With Your Menstrual Cycle with Chlo Hodgkinson

Hormones are essential for life and your health. They affect everything from blood sugar to blood pressure, growth, fertility, your sex drive, metabolism, and even sleep. Hormones are so important they influence the way we think and act day to day.
The menstrual cycle is regulated by hormones. So if we are having irregular periods, bleed between periods, bleed more heavily than usual, or develop severe pain during our period; this could be an indicator our hormones are out of wack.
Chlo Hodgkinson is a PT and Coach that has learned and trained to work with hormones and the menstrual cycle after recovering from her own journey with disordered eating and relative energy deficiency. After fully rehabilitating and healing her relationship with food and exercise, Chlo turned to social media to raise awareness on amenorrhea (the absence of menstruation). Then went on to become a coach to help clients get back to training after amenorrhea, as well as staying on track with their recovery and supporting them on that journey.
Chlo is passionate in helping females recover from disordered eating, amenorrhea, diet culture and learning to workout with the menstrual cycle. Chlo is also part of The My Possible Self team and creates content for our social channels.
Chlo speaks candidly about her journey with disordered eating habits and overtraining and why losing her period was the catalyst towards her seeking help to heal her hormones and regain her menstrual cycle.
Chlo shares the signs to look out for your hormones may be imbalanced and what steps you need to take to get the help you need. Chlo and host Gabby also talk about the pressures society puts on females particularly when it comes to what is regarded as a ‘healthy’ body image. And Chlo also explains the significant relationship between anxiety, food and exercise.
To follow Chlo on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chlohodgkinson/
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself

Heal Childhood Wounds, Transform Your Relationships with Vienna Pharaon

None of us had a perfect childhood; we are all carrying around wounds and behaviours that don’t serve us. But what if we could break free from unhealthy family patterns to liberate the way we live and love? 
As children we observe and absorb everything around us. And we teach ourselves to behave in a way that helps to make us feel safe. But at what cost? Have we developed coping mechanisms and strategies to try to feel more worthy, prioritized, safe, like we belong? Could we have developed trust issues because we witnessed our parents keep secrets? Do we struggle with perfectionism because our caregivers rewarded our good behaviour and achievements, but punished or ignored us when we didn’t live up to their standards? 
When we start to unpack the significant impact and deep conditioning that our roots and origin wounds have on our relationship patterns - past and present - we start to recognise our triggers and coping mechanisms that might actually be doing more harm than good.But it doesn’t have to be that way, says licensed marriage and family therapist and author of the best selling book ‘The Origins of You’ Vienna Pharaon.
Vienna is a licensed marriage and family therapist and one of New York City’s most sought-after relationship therapists. Vienna has practised therapy for more than fifteen years and is the creator of @mindfulMFT on Instagram where she is helping over 700K people around the world heal their childhood wounds.
Vienna shares the five major origin wounds that most struggle with; consciously or subconsciously. She also explains how the healing journey begins by exploring what we have learned as a child - how to relate to others, ourselves, and the world around us. Host Gabby and Vienna also talk about identifying triggers, which could be unresolved wounds trying to get our attention. And how we can shift our patterns and habits to create a new healthier path for ourselves.
For more on Vienna Pharaon: https://viennapharaon.com/
To follow Vienna on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mindfulmft/
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself

Ask The Expert: Tackling Health Anxiety with Cherelle Roberts

Health anxiety is a common condition, diagnosed in 4% to 5% of people. But experts believe that the disorder often goes undiagnosed and may affect more than 10% of the entire population. In this Ask The Expert episode host Gabby puts your questions to ex-health anxiety sufferer.. now relatable health anxiety therapist and social media influencer Cherelle Roberts. 
To follow Cherelle on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cherellethinks/
To watch Cherelle's health anxiety videos on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@cherellethinks6398
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself
To email a question for our next expert: podcast@mypossibleself.com

My Story: The Harsh Reality of Chasing The Perfect Body with Victoria Niamh

This episode is dedicated to hearing the powerful story of the previous episode's guest. Victoria Niamh is a female confidence coach, mentor, social media Influencer and the Founder of ‘The Glow Up Project’ which aims to inspire women to understand that the real glow up is an inside job. Vic advocates for body confidence and breaking stigma around mental health and is passionate about empowering women to unconditionally own and love themselves.
Vic's passion for helping women stemmed from her own harrowing story battling anorexia nervosa, orthorexia and body dysmorphia as she pushed herself to dangerous degrees to obtain the 'perfect body'. First as a dancer and then as a bikini model. 
This conversation contains material of a sensitive and potentially distressing nature involving eating disorders that may be triggering for some individuals. This does not mean the material WILL be triggering; just that it MAY.
Please take care of yourself, and don’t hesitate to ask for help if you need it.
To Learn More about The Glow Up Project : https://theglowupproject.co.uk/
To follow The Glow Up project on Instagram: @theglowupproject_
To follow Victoria Niamh on Instagram: @victorianiamh
To download the free My Possible Self App: https://mypossibleself.app.link/podcast
To follow My Possible Self on Instagram: @mypossibleself